Exhausted, Yet Pursuing
Remember the story of Gideon from the Bible. Gideon was a man appointed by God to lead the Israelites out from under the oppression of the Midianites. He was an unlikely choice. He came from a family that was the weakest in Manasseh and he was the least in his father’s house. Still, God chose to use him.
Gideon repeatedly questioned God and asked Him to provide sign after sign after sign to confirm what Gideon was being asked to do. God did not grow weary of Gideon, but He did challenge him to step out in faith. God told Gideon to attack an army of many thousands with only 300 men. Gideon obeyed. After routing the Midianites, Gideon and his men pursued them. Judges 8:4 says “And Gideon came to the Jordan and crossed over, he and the 300 men who were with him, exhausted yet pursuing.”
This story of Gideon struck me anew this week. As I thought about this story and the struggles that so many of us have in our finances, I was encouraged.
Thinking about my own financial journey, I often feel like I am unable to get a handle on all of the expenses and my continual desire for more. I feel like I am the least in my father’s house. I know God is prompting me to live a certain way and give a certain way, but I come back to Him over and over and over again questioning Him and asking for assurance and confirmation. Once I finally decide to obey, with what feels like an inadequate ability and resolve, I get to see God provide and experience the contentment that comes with that knowledge.
It is here that the words “exhausted yet pursuing” really come to life. When I have begun the journey and taken the steps to obey God in my finances, I often come to a point where I feel exhausted. I don’t want to continue and feel tempted to go back to my old habits. However, I know what I have seen, I know that God has been faithful, and I know that He is leading me into a better way. So, even though I am exhausted, I keep pursuing.
This is an amazing place to be. It is one of dependence and trust. If you are here. If you feel exhausted. Look back at where you began and where you are now. You are not the least in your father’s house. You have seen God provide. Even though you may be exhausted, keep pursuing. It will be worth it.
May God grant you the grace to keep pursuing.